I’m utterly excited for 2017. This is going to be a fresh new start for me. I am going to study hard, make friends and finally be truly happy. I am not saying that I am not happy now, but I feel like I lack something. No, it’s not like I am saying “when I get this and that I’ll be happy” it’s just…
Sitting at home studying and having no social life whatsoever as well as feeling completely awkward talking to people is not the life that I imagine myself to have, you know? That’s why I have to start anew and live the life I want to live and be Happy.
2016 was a year of Big decisions in my life, a year of Big changes that led to me being happier than I was for the past year or so. Let me maybe tell you about them?
#1 I started realising how unhappy I was in my relationship. How we both wanted to change each other, how we didn’t want to talk as much any more, how I was forcing myself to be somebody who I am not. I started arguing with him about that, I started insisting on him that I wanted to be Me. That I was tired of dressing up everyday, doing my makeup everyday, wearing heels everyday, doing my nails every single week, being afraid of talking about certain topics… Of course he would allow me to do the thing I wanted to, but you know that feeling when somebody says “fiiine…” and then he is all sulky and you don’t want to do that anymore? Yep, that’s what happened every time. So I continued to do all that until we graduated. Then the scales fell from my eyes and I could not be with him anymore. I could not let me be somebody else just to please him anymore, I wanted to live my life, full of no-makeup faces, tracksuits, trainers and flat sandals, cooking delicious vegan food, talking about whatever the hell I wanted… Just finally being Me. So we broke up finally. It was tough at the beginning of course but time heals wounds and I felt much better after a few weeks.
#2 I scored high in the Matura exam and I got to the university and degree course of my dreams with the highest score (or one of the highest).
#3 I got B in a CPE exam. Three years ago, if you had told me, that I would score this high in the C P E exam, I would have laughed at you so hard.
#4 I went on my first alone trip – alone means without parents but with a friend of mine – in the summer to Wrocław.
#5 I became a true vegan. I watched documentaries and instantly decided that I cannot wear leather anymore and that I have to stop buying it. I wore leather for some time though, but I didn’t buy any (ok, maybe once…). I feel great living this way and I hope more people would understand what is actually happening and make the connection between an animal and their plate or clothing.
#6 I started playing the piano once again. It feels so good. There’s something magical and rousing in the piano. The sound is so beautiful and the songs that you can play are endless. Playing it you feel like you’re adding more beauty into the world. The same is with singing. I am sure that any of you who plays an instrument whether it be piano, trumpet or your voice understands what I am trying to convey.
#7 I changed my diet from predominantly raw to starch based. And I feel awesome. I have more energy, I don’t have to eat this much, my weight is steady and healthy. I eat more fats and protein and come on, we all now you like yourself some beans, tofu, peanut butter and avocado.
#8 I’ve been screwed in my relationship. I’ve been played with. I’ve been hated and I’ve been unloved. But that’s okay, I’m stronger now and I know that certain people should be avoided at all costs. Only surround yourself with people who love you for who you are and who love you no matter what. And if people in question read that, please refrain from commenting, I don’t want to have anything to do with you any more.
#9 I realised that I am more than my looks. Of course I want to move my body and be healthy (keeping in mind that I have to study, eat and sleep) but having some extra thigh and belly fat is no longer an issue. I found that people generally do not care and me neither.
#10 I got my licence. And my own car (ok I own only half of it but for the majority of time I am driving it)
#11 I’ve grown a lot as a person. I feel like I am more mature than I was at the beginning of the year. I’ve learned quite a bit about people.
That is all I believe. As you can see big changes and big decisions but they all led me to being happier every day. Now, in 2017, let’s get even happier together, shall we?